Category: 2020 Pacific Crest Trail

Molly and Clint wanted to get an early start today as well. Before we all went to bed, it was agreed that we would start getting ready 30 minutes after we heard Sassy talk. This was a tough alarm clock this morning. Usually it’s “Bear, I swear to god I’m going to kill you if you do…” whatever it is Bear is trying to do to wake her up. This morning, I barely heard a mumble “I don’t want to get up.” I wasn’t sure if I heard it or not, but I started my mental clock. 

I prepared Bunny fresh ground coffee with lots of cream along with biscuits and gravy made from Scratch (or was it Mountain House, there’s too many backpacker meal companies these days). When her coffee cooled to the proper temperature, I gently woke her. I told her to take her time even though it was 7:15. I hadn’t even heard Bear light their stove for coffee. When she sat up, I looked outside and Bear was leaning on the log with his pack beside him. They were trying to trick us. They had a 30 minute jump on us. Game on!

Bunny likes the biscuits and gravy better than any meal, so that wasn’t difficult to get her to wolf that down. I told her they were playing us in front of Clint and Molly trying to appear they were faster at getting ready since we had talked about that last night. Bunny put on her game face and just said “They’re going down.” Bunny tries to present a laid back face to the world, but she’s not going to let the likes of Bear and Sassy make her look bad in front of strangers. Our tent was suddenly a whirlwind of packing. 

I packed up almost as fast as Bunny. While she was digging her hole, I filtered water. I tried to convince her to dig a bigger hole to save me some game time, but she wouldn’t go for it. As soon as she got back, we took the tent down and folded it. Having that done, she handed me the deuce of spades and shouted “Go like the wind. I believe in you.” I headed down the windward side of the mountains (fearing a repeat of yesterday’s impulse swatting of mosquitoes) and I was smoking. I ran back up to the campsite just as Bear said “looks like we won today.” Where’s Sassy? Has Sassy been to the woods? I looked over at her and she looked thin and happy. They had suckered us! I knew they cut a corner somewhere, but I didn’t know where. It wasn’t until super that I learned Bear hadn’t brushed his teeth. I hope the cavity was worth the sham victory. 

We haven’t seen very many thru-hikers since leaving Shelter Cove. I’m guessing we are past the leading speed bubble and in the gap before the main bubble catches up to us. We did meet a few outliers today starting with Mom. Mom was a very friendly German girl from near Frankfurt. We told her of our experiences with the front leading jerks and she immediately named the three trouble makers. She told us they had even been kicked out by angels along the way because they refused to wear face masks. She promised us that everyone else was friendly that she had met (which coincides with our experiences as well). 

Next, we met Dos Equis from Edwardsville, IL. We spent a fair amount of time trading trail info with him including water spots and campsites. He told us about a huge campsite above Thielsen Creek where we were headed. He said it was right below the mountain and one of the most beautiful spots he had camped at so far. I saw the 2192 tattoo on his arm and asked him when he hiked the AT. He had just hiked it last year. Even though he was our age, he was putting in big miles compared to us. He’s gotten in quite a few 30s while we still haven’t even put in a 20 yet. 

We had a goal of making it to the high point of the north half of the PCT for lunch, but the skies looked pretty threatening. Anyone who has spent any time with Bunny knows that she is not a rational Bunny in a storm. She quickly spirals down to an “every man for himself, get the hell out of my way” rampage as she runs away hysterically. Bear has witnessed this, so he calmly suggested we stop for a lunch break a few miles before the high point to allow the storm to pass. There was a small thunderstorm with some rain that passed us. It wasn’t that bad on this side of the mountain, but Bears weather app did report a lightening strike less than a mile from our location (he wisely withheld this information from Bunny). We later discovered Mt Thielsen is one of the most lightening struck mountains in the US with over 3500 strikes per year. We now just have to convince Bunny she’s passed the worst case scenario on the trail. 

Upon reaching the high point of OR and WA, we discovered a lot of water on the trail and a lot less dust was getting kicked up as we walked. My memory is that we were close to 8000’ when we went over Goat Rocks in Washington last year, but we did take the higher (and longer) alternate route over Goat Rocks. On the bright side, it’s all downhill for the remainder of Oregon, definitely all the way to Thielsen Creek. 

We were looking forward to the campsite Dos Equis told us about, so Bear and I climbed up opposite sides of the creek to find the spot. I was the unfortunate one to find it. I say unfortunate because there was a solo woman there that I can only graciously call a Complete Bitch. She had chosen the best spot in the site that could easily hold 20 tents. As a courtesy, I asked if she minded if we camped up here with her. No one, in over 6000 miles of hiking has ever said anything other than “sure, lots of room” or some other pleasantry. This woman said “I really would prefer that you didn’t. This is supposed to be a wilderness experience. There are lots of other places down in the woods.” I was shocked and couldn’t believe what she said. Bunny was behind me asking me if this was the spot. I yelled back “Hold on a sec.”

I was well over 50’ from the woman and couldn’t believe what I had heard. I said “Excuse me?” She said “there’s lots of other places down below. I don’t want you up here with me. It would spoil my experience.” I had heard right and now I was pissed. Bear, Sassy, and Bunny were waiting for an answer. I wished I had just yelled down to them to come up and not told them anything of the exchange, but I didn’t. Instead I said “if we do camp here, I promise none of us will say a word to you or acknowledge your existence.” I started checking out the huge area some more to piss her off but I didn’t give her a chance to say anything when I realized what a huge area she was laying claim to. “You know this is public land and you don’t own it.” She was glaring at me and said again “this is supposed to be a wilderness experience.” I walked to the edge of the clearing and yelled down to everyone “it’s a beautiful large area but there is an arrogant bitch up here so let’s look some more.” Apparently, we haven’t passed all the assholes on the trail. 

We settled on a “less drama filled” camping spot on the other side of the creek. Bear and I wanted to camp in the big spot just to annoy the old bitty, but Sassy and Bunny don’t like even righteous confrontations. I finally cooled off when I put my feet in the melt water creek and all the heat got sucked out of me. We washed off and filtered water while turning our feet blue. We finished the day eating super, together, outside of our tents, without mosquitoes (or any other annoying bitches) bothering us. 

We had enough signal that Sassy got a text that her father had been taken to the ER. She was able to make a call and discover that he hadn’t been drinking enough liquids and the pill form of chemo he is taking is too strong for him. I encourage whoever reads this blog to send positive energy, prayers, or positive thoughts his way. 

We have covered 50 miles in the last 3 days and are will be just shy of 300 miles when we get to the highway tomorrow. We still haven’t knocked out a 20, but if we can consistently put in 16-18 miles every day, we will be able to start getting some 100+ mile weeks under our belts. It’s hard to think that we are under the gun when we are just getting started, but we’ve got to be mindful of snow in the Sierra in October. At any rate, this geriatric group is us getting up to speed. If we can only keep the weak link in line (sadly, the youngest, me) we will be able to finish this year. I’m hiking with some tough older birds. 

EFG

There are certain events that are so unique that they stand out in the memory of your life. Some are good events that make you happy when you think of them. Happy events like meeting your significant other, or getting married, or having children. Sad events like the day your sister dies too young at 38, the death of family members, or catastrophic events like 9-11. Today started with such an event for me. 

In a word, I had a shitty start to my day. I will always remember today’s experience up there with being 4 years old when I was so sick I couldn’t stop throwing up. My dad finally got me calmed down and I sat on his hand in his lap while I watched “The Brady Bunch” and pooped in his hand. (Probably more traumatic for him than me, but memories are memories). Or the time when I first encountered squatting porcelain on the Annapurna Circuit in Nepal. I didn’t quite have the knack of it and didn’t squat low enough. I ended up filling them instead of hitting the bowl in the floor. Fortunately, I had a pocket knife and could cut off my underwear. Today moves to the top of my poop memory horrors. 

I was going to wait until we climbed away from Summit Lake because I knew the mosquitoes would be bad when we got away from the wind blowing on the peninsula we were camped on. As I’ve already established, I cave from PPP (peer poop pressure). Everyone said they weren’t going to wait, so of course, my bowels joined the chorus. 

As soon as I crossed the trail from our spot, the mosquitoes swarmed. I tried cutting uphill to catch some breeze. I looked around to make sure I was out of eyesight of anyone and saw a camper van through the trees. I cut back a bit and found a higher spot behind some trees. I dug my hole and did my business. As I was filling out the first round of paperwork, I looked down between my legs and saw hundreds of blood suckers gnawing on my thighs. My first instinct was to swat them and kill as many as possible. One problem though, I had filled out the first round of paperwork, but not submitted it yet. I was now covered by more than mosquitoes. 

As I was trying to start to clean up this mess in addition to the subsequent paperwork which needed to be filled out and submitted, a group of nobo hikers appeared about 10 feet from me. I had circled back around to the trail without realizing it. I made uncomfortable eye contact with the lead hiker, pulled up my pants, and turned my back to them. Bear appeared on the trail and started talking to them. This helped create a diversion to keep them from looking at me, but there was a huge magnitude of paperwork that still needed to be completed. 

They hurriedly left and Bear proceeded uphill to me and gave his usual “grrr” to let me know he was about. He was the only one who hadn’t seen me. He apologized and said he hoped he hadn’t interrupted my privacy and started hunting for his own spot assuming I was finishing up. I told him he should probably move along a bit. When he left, I spend the next 5 minutes finishing up old business. 

Afterwards, I went back to camp to get back in a breeze to get relief from the multitudes of demon spawn. I washed my hands off in the lake then sanitized them, then washed them again to be sure, and finished up with some more hand sanitizer. I couldn’t shake the feeling from my hands. It’s like when you have a young puppy that has an accident on the floor and you step on it with bare feet. It takes days before you forget the feeling between your toes. 

At least I knew what to expect from the mosquitoes today. I changed into my long sleeve shirt and pants, put on my head net and tucked it under my buff on my neck so no skin was exposed. I then got out my glove liners. As a final round of defense, I sprayed myself down with a eucalyptus insect repellent. I was a bit warm, but I was ready for mosquito battle. 

It was the right move because the little blood suckers were miserable all the way up our first climb. 7 miles of pure hell. Sweat was pouring down my forehead. I couldn’t see because of the bug net, but, for once, I wasn’t bothered by the high pitched hum in my ears because I knew it was outside of the net. 

When we reached the top of the climb, we finally got a strong enough breeze that we could remove our head nets and relax for a few minutes. This will be one of my favorite breaks of all time. Bear and I had gotten some song lyrics confused earlier so he pulled out his phone and played some Jethro Tull. My personal favorite, Locamotive Breath, followed by Skate Away. While we were sitting there we talked about major life events that got us to where we are today and how they brought us all together. Bear and Sassy are tremendous fun and we laugh more with them than anyone, but it’s also nice to have the serious, soul searching conversations. 

The next 3 blissful miles to Windago Pass were mosquito free. We passed a few thru-hikers that told us about the water cache at the pass. Thank god it was there, because we didn’t see any other water since we left camp. We were planning on a pond about 9 miles in, but it must have dried up. While we were sitting having lunch, a car drove by. It looked like the driver was checking on the cache and then he drove away. A few minutes later, he came back and parked. 

The driver got out of the car, grabbed a cold drink, popped the top and walked up to the cache. I thought he was just showing off now. He had cold drinks and we had hot water cooking in the sun. Don’t get me wrong, we were very thankful for the water, but as I suggested to Bear later in the day, when Sassy overheated, he might pee on Sassy rather than pour any cache water on her. The pee would be much cooler. 

The driver was Jojo who works for USGS. He’s out for a week helping a coworker take some 100 year photos to monitor changes in formations and glacial status on some local mountains. He came over and started talking to us. He then realized his drink was cold and he generously offered each of us drinks. This is true magic. Jojo wasn’t planning on being an angel and we weren’t planning on anything at the pass (other than hoping the water cache was still being maintained). We spent an hour talking with Jojo. This was just the break I needed after my shitty start to the day. 

It was less than 6.5 miles to the place we were planning on camping. Thanks to our break with Jojo, it was past the heat of the day and we were feeling more refreshed. The best part about this hike was that the final 3 miles were downhill. As I get more tired during the day, I need more data to keep me going. I’m not allowed a phone of my own, so I asked Bunny to let me see the phone and then I’ll carry it the rest of the way to camp (she gets mad if she has to take the phone out for me repeatedly). I needed to prepare my feet for the final push. 

I opened Guthook and it said I still had a mile to go. I tried to refresh it several times, but it always said 1 mile. I was devastated. I thought we were almost there. I sat down on a log and got out my pee water for a drink. Just as I sat down, I heard a dog bark and Guthook updated our position to 0.1 miles. I was happy and my feet were ecstatic. Kunta Kente I have found you. 

When I rounded the corner I saw Bear and Sassy talking with Molly and Clint. Scooby was having nothing to do with all the new strangers arriving. I dropped my pack and went to the ground. Everyone just assumed it was my love of dogs and didn’t bother to check if I was ok. Over the next couple of hours, we got to know Molly, Clint, and Scooby. 

Molly is a school teacher in Portland. They had just gotten married last September which prevented them from going on a honeymoon because school was starting. The plan was an exotic vacation in a locale like Bora Bora, but Covid struck; backwoods it is. The new family hasn’t really backpacked much before, so they tried to do a lot of research ahead of time. They decided, because of Covid, to do an eleven day self supported hike from Crate Lake to Elk Lake. Since they are relatively new to the idea of hiking, they are carrying a pretty large tent, chairs (I’ve often considered this option but settle for logs on long trips), 11 days of food, plus 11 days of food for Scooby. Even with all this, their packs aren’t much over 40# each (the 4 # of trail mix might soon be fed to chipmunks). 

They had a bad day today like I did (maybe not EXACTLY like my day, but hard). Water has become an issue for them and they were worried about finding water here at Six Horse Creek. Instead of dropping their packs to check out the situation, they decided to hike down to the creek as a group. Molly saw the stagnant pond and said “oh, hell no!” so they ventured further down to find an actual stream and water fall. Afterwards they hiked back up (with heavy packs now made even heavier with a couple gallons of water) to where we met them. They are both young and in great shape, so they can get by with the extra work. After Clint led Bear and me to the water, I can only conclude Sassy and Bunny would have died doing what Molly did and/or Bear and I would be dead for taking them down. With a few more experiences like today, they will be excellent backpackers. Nothing teaches better than a few miserable days. They’re already talking thru-hike assuming kids can wait. 

I was shot after our water trip because I had gotten eaten alive down in the stream. I had to stop and filter water while Bear and Clint just grabbed some unfiltered and left me in the swarm. I was a bit dehydrated, tired from the hiking, and slightly anemic from the loss of blood. By the time we got back, Bunny had already set up our beds, washed off the days grime, changed clothes, and started self-medicating. She was so worried about us taking so long, she had even asked Sassy if she heard anything coming up the trail. Bunny was hungry and wanted to go to bed. We were messing up her evening. 

I begged everyone’s pardon and explained that, even though I was exhausted and sweating, I had to retire to the tent where I had the privilege of preparing my wife’s super. I hope I set a good example for Clint by doing all the heavy lifting and cooking. As it’s well known to all the males in the backcountry, a backpacking husband’s work is never done.

EFG

In the last 3 days, I have betrayed every belief I’ve held since birth. I’ve eaten mushrooms, tuna, shrimp, and eggs. Yes, it is very clear, even to me, that I am traveling with the wrong crowd. The connection as to why I dislike the first 3 is very clear: shit. Mushrooms grow in it and sea creatures swim in it and filter it through their gills. I dislike eggs because I was raised Catholic and Catholics hate abortion in any form. Eggs are merely chicken abortions and I cannot condone it (with the exception of the rooster raping the hen).

Bear woke us up at 7. I found it hard to believe that Sassy was up, but I watched her stagger along behind him clearly disoriented. When I saw her again, she had successfully fired her first shot of the day. I only mention this because right before we left Shelter Cove near 10, Sassy fired a second shot. She’s back!

We met at the store/restaurant where 3 of us ordered the recommended breakfast burrito (with eggs where I began my descent to hell) while Bunny was the outlier ordering pancakes and bacon. Bear spent the entire time trying to figure out how to address a bounce box of food to Fish Lake. The only address he has is a mile marker on a highway and they only accept UPS shipments. Bear is persistent. His 40+ years of working for NASA are finally paying off. He broke the code and successfully entered an address that the UPS website would accept. 

Finally on the trail, we noticed a strange phenomenon. Every 100’ of elevation change, we noticed that a horse dropped a load of ballast. This went on for 1600’ of elevation change. This was more precise clockwork than Sassy who can’t decide if she is firing a single barrel or double barrel. Finally, when we got to 6600’ we saw a rather large man and woman each carrying a saddle. Either the horses completely disintegrated carrying their massive loads, or they finally broke under the pressure and the couple ate them. They had a very scared dog with them that was convinced he was next. He ran towards us begging assistance but the couple approached us as well. I was scared. Normally, I won’t leave a dog in need, but I knew it was him or us. I kicked in the afterburners and we headed uphill to freedom.

We stopped for a snack at a nice snow melt stream. There was enough flow to filter and fill our bottles while we did the mosquito slap dance. Up to this point, I had not had any problem with skeeters, but everyone else was complaining about them. Bunny had bought some new eucalyptus repellant and it seemed to be working. 

The only climb we had today was now behind us. We’ve got just 50 miles to our next resupply point at Diamond Lake Lodge. Bunny and Bear checked and we had phone service, so I called the Lodge to see if we could get rooms for Tuesday night. We are now committed to at least three 15+ mile days to make our reservation. We decided to kick up the mileage we had planned for today. We were thinking of just doing 12 because of our late start but decided to push for 17. Bunny was easy to convince once we showed her the penis in Summit Lake sticking out into the water and large enough for 4 tents. She wanted that penis and was off in a flash. 

I was running to try to catch up with her. It was 6.5 miles to go and she was like a horse heading for the barn. Trying to keep up with her reminded me of Shaun Perks on the Camino when he got a taste for a beer about mid-afternoon. No one could keep up with him. Bunny started knocking out 18 minute miles. That’s 3.33 mph. The only other time we’ve gone that fast was after our escape from the serial killer last year in Washington.

We made it to camp in just a tad over 2 hours. We just couldn’t maintain the pace all the way. Bunny was afraid that nobos would beat us to the site. When we arrived, there was only one other sobo couple we had met last night just starting to set up. We picked our spots and set up our tents. The sketos weren’t completely overbearing, but we knew they would get bad as soon as the sun started going down and the breeze stopped. It was apparent we were going to be eating in our tents once again. 

There was enough of a reprieve for us to wash off in the lake, get water, filter some and boil what we needed before being forced into the tent. I did pee before heading inside in the hopes of buying time for the little bastards to die down after dark before I have to get out again. There is a steady high pitched hum of thousands of bloodsuckers just outside of our tent. Bunny is flipping around like a fish out of water. She didn’t get in a preemptive pee before heading in. 

EFG

It doesn’t matter what we do in the morning. If we decide we want to hurry, we can get ready by 9:25. If we decide we want a leisurely morning, we can get ready by 9:35. If we decide we’ll just go when we’re ready, we can get ready by 9:30. Either we are inconsistently consistent, or we operate on Sassy time. Today, without having to fold tents, waking up whenever, having a leisurely breakfast, and me choosing to hold off on hole digging, we hit the trail at…9:35. 

We knew we were having an easy walk into Shelter Cove. The first 2 miles were an easy up grade and the rest was all down hill. I was motivated for a couple of reasons to push fairly hard: 1) I wanted a shower, and 2) I didn’t dig a hole so I was all in for porcelain. Sassy clocked me at better than 3 mph. That’s screaming for an old, overweight guy fighting plantar fasciitis. Thank god and the modern marijuana industry for CBD oil. It has changed my life for the better. 

No one was as motivated as me to get a shower, but they were all motivated for me to have a shower. I’ve been wearing long pants and long sleeve shirts to reduce exposed surface area for blood sucking. It’s been hot and I’ve been sweating profusely. Disgusting facts to follow. Skip ahead if you don’t like old man issues. Here goes. 

Mosquitoes attack any exposed skin. Think about that for a second. You can wear long sleeves and pants, even gloves. Throw on a head net and you’ve got nothing exposed. But you’re hot and sweating a lot which makes you drink a lot more. Sometimes you end up drinking more than you need and your body does what with the extra water? It’s inevitable that you have to stop and pee. This is not as burdensome for a man as it is for a woman, but you’ve got to expose some skin (maybe there’s a market here for pee condoms). Here’s the problem. You’re a guy with excess stomach fat so your waist belt is very tight to push up the fat soufflé. Older males already have issues with completely emptying the bladder. You want to reduce exposure time as much as possible, so you might skip the extra shake that you might not in less trying times. All this leads to more of a urine smell in your pants than is otherwise, socially acceptable. This could be why dogs are drawn to me on the trail (I prefer to believe they can tell how much I love them, but I’ve got to face facts).

Once we began our descent into the Willamette Pass, we began running into lots of hikers. It was easy to distinguish the thru-hikers from the day hikers. First clue was odor. Thru-hikers, especially males, have a urine/sweat smell about them (it’s not just the old ones like me). They are not wearing face masks, and they walk very fast. Weekenders are usually heavier and have a slight sweaty odor that doesn’t quite mask the tide pods they did their laundry with. They also step way off the trail as anyone approaches. Day hikers smell of cologne, deodorant, and laundry detergent. They also wear face masks and run 50 yards uphill at the sign of any movement in the trail in front of them. I’ve seen a lone chipmunk start a stampede of day hikers. 

The front of the bubble is definitely here. We met several more thru-hikers including the Kiwi Sisters who’s reputation proceeded them up the trail. They are a couple of older New Zealanders (past retirement age) and they have zero body fat. One of the sisters complained about walking around all of the mountains; she’s a mountain climber and wants to go over them. The other just said there was more walking than she anticipated. They’re averaging 20-25 miles a day. We have yet to break a 20 mile day. 

We made it to Shelter Cove by 1:30. We went to the PCT hiker tent to drop our packs before we headed to the store for some lunch. There were probably a half dozen thru-hikers already there. They gave us a rundown on the campground. Guthook has some bad comments about Shelter Cove from some early hikers so everyone is a bit on edge about the place, but we only got good feedback and positive vibes from our initial entry. We even discovered there are laundry machines here. 

After we ate, showered, and did laundry, we returned to the hiker tent to have some hikers that weren’t there earlier, approach us and tell us this was for hikers only. They were quite rude to Bunny and Sassy. When I walked in and heard the smelly entitled hikers, I said we are hiking the PCT. We’re only LASHers (Long Ass Section Hikers who hike more than 1000 miles at a time) but we also believe in personal hygiene. This shut the loudest mouth jerk up who was supposedly a Triple Crowner who had been in camp all day but still hadn’t found time to do laundry or take a shower. Sassy was through with them. This guy was a complete ass to everyone and is why hikers get bad reputations. After he left, the crowd became very friendly. All it takes is one bad apple. 

We plugged in or electronics with our own plugs and cables then went up to the restaurant so we could connect to the WiFi. A bit later, I went back down to check on our charging progress to find someone had unplugged our phone and plugged their phone in using our cables. Guess who? Dirtbag Triple Crowner. I unplugged his phone and plugged ours back in but stuck around to make sure it wasn’t switched back. 

About 6p, the group of entitled dirtbags decided they were going to take off and hike the 8 miles to the Maiden Peak Shelter. I was so relieved that 1) they were leaving, and 2) they weren’t a day faster and showed up at the cabin last night. They’ll be getting there after dark and will be rude to whoever happens to be there. I am so glad I have never run into a group of thru-hikers like this before but worry about the damage a group like this does for the rest of us. Sassy said she was happy we’re sobos and don’t have to see them again. I didn’t bother to point out that even if we were nobos, we wouldn’t see them again because they consistently put in more miles than we do. Screw it. We are old and can afford to take our time. Mom and Dad aren’t paying for our hikes. 

EFG

The mosquitoes found us at first light. I was willing to wait them out, the wind will eventually blow again. Sure enough, by 8, we had enough breeze to safely emerge. If you got very far from the lake, they would converge on you. For this reason, I was willing to bind my cheeks and hike a few miles before I lost my morning weight. Sadly, I was a victim of peer turd pressure, so I joined everyone else in defiling the woods around Charlton Lake. 

It’s a good thing I’m spineless and can’t stand up to PPP (peer poop pressure) because as we were climbing up the side of the mountain, I scared a small crowd of grouse. Had I not previously dropped my load, I would have ended up wearing it instead. I didn’t want to have to cut another pair of underwear off of me and leave it behind. Tragically, that has happened to me once in a Nepal before I got the hang of the squatter porcelain. 

The mosquitoes were not consistent today. Instead of continuously ruining our day, they just intermittently drove us crazy. It was possible to find places to stop for drinks or a snack without going completely bonkers. It was at one of these breaks where Bear finally figured out why he and I have to tighten our waist belts 15 minutes after we put on our packs. Our stomach fat is like a fine soufflé, it takes about 15 minutes to rise. We tighten the belts to fill the void left behind. 

We dropped our packs at the junction to Bobby Lake and walked down to get water. The cabin we are heading to is dry so we have to carry enough water for the 3 mile hike in, supper, breakfast, and the walk out. Bobby Lake was surprisingly nice and mosquito free. There were people sunbathing on a rock just a short way from us. Bunny wanted to camp for the night here, but it would have made for too long of a day tomorrow. 

On the way to the cabin, we met our first thru-hiking American. Cannonball is from Indiana and has been putting in 40 mile days ever since he started. He’s trying to catch up to all the foreign hikers that are leading the pack. The Swedes (who have received names since we met them—Wolf and Arctic Fox) are either in front or just behind Viking (the Norwegian). Wolf and Arctic Fox entered the Sierra on April 26. Cannonball didn’t even start hiking until May 9. He’s well on the way to finishing in under 100 days. 

Maiden Peak Shelter sleeps 14. There are only four of us and we don’t really want to share because of Covid. We’ve devised a few plans to ensure our privacy tonight. Option 1; if we’re the first to arrive we will spread out all of our gear to make it look as though the shelter is full from a distance. If that doesn’t scare would be hikers away, Bear has agreed to cough furiously while we ask newcomers if they have an inReach to call for help, explaining that he’s been dizzy all day and listless. We tried to make him eat some supper, but he only complained about how tasteless it was. Yes, it’s a bit juvenile, but we’re LASHers. Option 2; if someone is already there, we’ll hike another 3 miles to the next campsite. 

We were the first to arrive before 4. We quickly implemented option 1. We tried to make Bear look sickly and disgusting but realized we couldn’t improve upon what 3 days of hiking had already done to his appearance. We continued with 4 pack explosions while we prepared super. By the time we finished eating (before 6) no one had shown up. We’re thinking we’re home free.

Now the only problem is getting Sassy calm enough to sleep inside. She’s afraid of mice. Deathly so. This is going to be hard to make it through the night without throwing a small item on her in the night and yell “mouse!”  If it weren’t for the fact that Bear, who has already offered to set the tent up in the loft and scouted a spot outside for a tent so he can accommodate her when/if she freaks, I would throw the mouse. I’ll just have to wait until sunrise. We might get our earliest start yet. 

EFG

As if this is a surprise to anyone, but Sassy got out of the tent and said (yelled, actually) “I absolutely hate (pick your expletive, it won’t be as bad as the one she chose) mornings.” Poor Bear was speechless. I know his pain. You make your partner coffee and breakfast in bed, and the best you can hope for is to avoid their wrath. I tried to deflect for Bear a bit, he was still shaken from the glasses incident of two days ago. “Excuse me, ma’am, but yesterday wasn’t as bad as we thought it would be. Maybe today will be better as well.” “Shut up Easy. I don’t need your optimistic rantings this early. Save it for someone who cares.” I tried, Bear. You’re on your own. I crawled back in my tent and cried. 

Carrying water a mile and a half to camp is the way to go. Even when I sent Bunny out on bathroom recon, she came back and reported no mosquito bites on butt. This is as close to an all clear there is. But it gets better. The soil was nice and loamy making it easy to dig a nice deep cat hole. I haven’t dug one this pretty since leaving the desert of Southern California last year. 

We were happy. We were mosquito free. We felt a little cocky thinking that we had Oregon all figured out. We took a smiling picture at the trail junction sign in the heart of our camp to start the day. We were laughing as we walked out of camp. 50 feet later we walked into mosquito hell. 

I tried to tough it out a bit and pretend they weren’t that bad. I hadn’t worn long sleeves or put the legs on my pants this morning and they were feasting on all the soft white parts of my arms and legs (which is every bit of exposed skin). They were flying into my glasses and bouncing off. But worst of all was flying into my ears. I pulled my buff over my ears and picked up my pace. It helped a little. I asked Bunny how she was doing. “This is horrible. The worst I’ve ever been in the mosquitoes. I can’t take it.” 

I tried to find Sassy and Bear, but they were nowhere to be seen. They had stopped to rub Jean Luc Picard over themselves (apparently, old bald men put Sassy in a good mood. Sadly, it works on Bear’s mood just as much). I asked Bunny for our lotion to put on my arms and legs while I was walking. It helped to knock them down a bit, but not so much that we could stop walking for any time without getting swarmed. That was how our first 4 miles of hiking went. We couldn’t stop for any longer than it took to take a drink of water. 

We came upon a couple of Nobo’s about our age that were completely covered up and wearing head nets. It doesn’t look like it’s going to be getting better today. We talked to them for a bit, swatting ourselves while we were standing still. They told us the mosquitoes had only been bad for them for the last 3 days, but when they told us how far they were going each day, we q uickly figured out we have a week of hell to look forward to. As we were getting ready to part ways, I asked them if they had ran into Charcoal B and Struggles. They said they had about 3 days ago at Six Horse Spring almost 60 miles ahead of us.

Struggles had sent us a text on Sunday saying they’d be at Crater Lake on Monday. If they were at Six Horse Spring 3 days ago, they must be a couple days later than that, but they are well over 80 miles ahead of us. We were hoping to catch up to them before they finish the Oregon section. Perhaps they’ll continue on into a Northern California for a while since they’re making such great time. They started at Santium Pass about 6 days before we got there and we’re not really catching up to them. 

About 6 miles in, we all needed a break. I found a shady spot with a slight breeze that had some sitting logs. As soon as we dropped our packs, I got out my pants legs to reattach, and switched to a long sleeve shirt. I also got out my head net and put it on. It was the first real relief I had gotten all day, but it comes with a price. Today was pretty hot and all the extra clothes and head net makes it that much hotter. 

I was completely out of water but didn’t want to stop to fill up because of the devil spawn. We came to Irish lake and I broke down. While I was getting water, Bear read about the trail ahead and discovered it was an exposed climb, so they decided to fill up on water as well. So now our packs are heavier from water weight, it was extremely hot, the mosquitoes were still driving us crazy. It was not a good time. Sassy even said “I’m not having any fun.” As always, the trail provides when we were at our low point. 

We came to the next dirt road and I heard someone say “Hikers, welcome.” In the middle of nowhere,we ran into magic. Three guys had pulled a little trailer into the middle of the woods and were planning on camping there for the next 4 days. It had taken them 3 hours to travel the final 4 miles because the road was so crappy. They invited us to drop our packs and take seats. We happily obliged. 

Tazz, Horse, and Red Eagle has been up around Mt Hood last week giving magic, but hadn’t run into many hikers, so they decided to move further south in the hope of running into more hikers. They’re hoping to have at least 30 hikers come by. We were their first at this location. They had hotdogs, watermelon, sodas, and beers. We spent over an hour with them. 

Tazz and Horse had both hiked the PCT last year. Bunny and I told them about our attempt last year, and then tried the “it’s a small hiking world” game where we try to name common people we all know. There was quite a few. I actually don’t know how we missed Tazz early on. He started just a few weeks after us, but we all knew the twins, Trash Can and Store Brand, who we had met in Northern California after Burney Falls and again in Washington near the end of the trail. We had a great time getting refreshed and reminiscing about last year’s experience. 

The two sodas and food they gave me were just what the doctor ordered. We didn’t think we’d run into any magic this year. We were all excited, cooled down, and refreshed for the final 6 miles of our hike. The two sodas even created a scenario for me which hadn’t happened since we got out of the tent this morning…I was finally able to pee. 

The section of trail was as Bear had described—exposed. This was another burn zone, but from the looks of the trees, it was well over a decade ago. I saw a couple of girls coming towards us and they looked to be dragging a bit. I thought I’d brighten their day and tell them there was magic ahead. This did perk them up. Cold drinks and food on a hot day are always appreciated, but when you throw in the word “free,” now that’s hiker motivation. 

Dropsy and Baby Feet were just doing the Oregon section of the trail (about 450 miles). Dropsy got her name because in a single day, she dropped both her sleeping bag and tent off of cliffs while they were hiking. Fortunately, they were able to retrieve both items. Baby feet and Dropsy had stopped at the cabin where we intend to spend tomorrow night. They had found some baby mice there after they found their poisoned mother. Baby Feet is a softy for wild animals (even mice), so they were carrying the babies out to a friend that is going to meet them tomorrow. Baby Feet must not be totally committed to saving the mice if she’s letting a girl named “Dropsy’ carry them. Two days so far and they are still alive in their cheese box transport. 

We made it to Charlton Lake around 6:30. Naturally, we have a back up plan if we don’t like the camping in the area. We dropped our packs and spread out looking for the ideal spot. Bear went up a side trail to a parking lot to see if there were pit latrines. I headed down the opposite direction to get water while looking for other sites. When I saw the lake and the gorgeous spots along the shore, I knew we’d camp down there, so I didn’t get any water.

Once Bear returned with the sad news of “no latrines.” We all headed down to the lake. There was a steady breeze, so no skeeters. I had already picked out a spot on a point that gave us water on three sides. First order of business was to get in the lake to get cleaned up and cooled off. We set up camp and we’re able to eat outside, mosquito free. 

While we were getting ready to eat, we felt a thump thump over our heads. When we looked up, we saw a bald eagle just a few feet above us making his final approach to the lake hoping to snag some food. The eagle missed what he was trying for, but swooped up into a dead tree directly across from us where he had a good view of his surroundings. He stayed there the entire time we were eating. 

What started out as a fairly mundane to crappy day through forests without views, terrible mosquitoes, and high heat, gradually morphed into a great day to be on the trail. We found out where our friends are. We got trail magic when we needed it most. Most amazing of all was ending the day with a bald eagle flying over us and then watching us while we ate. There’s a motto “never quit on a bad day.” We weren’t anywhere near the idea of quitting, but today demonstrated why you don’t want to quit on a bad day, because it can turn amazing in a heartbeat. 

EFG

We screwed the pooch this morning. We normally try to maximize town time, yet, somehow we found ourselves hiking at 10:45–a full 15 minutes before checkout time at the hotel we had been staying at which was now 40 miles away. What in the hell went wrong? In a word, Bear. 

I guess you’ve got to take the bad with the good. Bear takes care of the vast majority of planning and scheduling as well as alternative plans. 40 plus years working for NASA has him trained to anticipate every possible plan deviation and have a scenario already in place and practiced for said deviations. I only had one thing to do this morning (independent of the master plan). I had been assigned eating time from 7:38 to 8:17 with return to the hotel by 8:30. From 8:31 to 9:45, I had to get my food box bounced to Diamond Lodge Resort. 9:46, report to hotel lobby for verification of readiness for transport to trailhead. If we make all of daily goals, we get gold stars. 10 gold stars earns a zero day. Sassy lost a buttload of gold stars when she broke his glasses, so we may not be getting another day off any time soon.

We had been talking about elk on the drive to Elk Lake with our taxi driver. We were primed for elk. The minute we stepped on the trail, we saw not just a single set of elk tracks, but what appeared to be an entire herd. They were fresh on top of obvious boot prints. They couldn’t be too far ahead of us, so we turned on the gas. Stated another way, we were able to attain an uphill speed of nearly 2 mph (screaming speeds for old hikers with full packs coming off a triple zero). 

We made the mile to the junction with the PCT in under 28 minutes. The heat we thought we were feeling from the sun, may actually have been air friction burns from our supersonic speeds. I headed straight to the first shady spot on the trail and sat down. Sassy was right behind me and said “look at all of them.”  I got up expecting to see elk, but saw llamas. Lots of llamas.

I started walking toward them only to see a woman lying on the ground in obvious heat distress. We may need a primer on tracking. There were 5 women with 11 llamas that had just started out from Elk Lake ahead of us. They had planned for nearly every eventuality with coolers full of beer, extra tents, food for 4 days, and, I’m sure, makeup. The one thing they may have forgotten was electrolytes. They seemed to have the situation under control with a nurse handling the downed woman. We offered assistance but they said they were fine. 

Every hiker we met for the last couple days we hiked, told us the mosquitoes were plague level from where they came. We checked the maps for where we were heading starting today, and saw the trail lined with ponds and wetlands. That was a big reason we had decided on the extra day in Bend—lack of motivation from fear of extensive bloodsucking. Some hikers we met even told us we were heading into burn areas. We’re sick of burn areas because they’re hot, dusty, and miserable enough without throwing in billions of mosquitoes. 

Every last one of us said we could have used an extra day in town (on top of the triple we had already taken). Bear said if we made it to 5 zeros, he might not have the will power to return. Since we’d already gotten the ride, we decided to just head out as per Bear’s “alternative plan 20c£.” Even so, I could still use a nap since I didn’t get any the last 3 days. Bunny had me hopping all the time she was snoring away. 

To recap, we were prepared for a pretty crappy mosquito infested day of walking in a dry burn area. We all had our head nets ready. What a relief that it didn’t turn out that way. What we had instead was a pretty hot and miserable hike through occasional pockets of mosquitoes that would drive the average city slicker nuts (but we aren’t you average city slicker). Better yet was that we didn’t encounter any burn areas at all. We came to the conclusion that people telling us we were going into burn areas just assumed we were heading north. 

We didn’t stop for water until about a mile and a half before the place we had decided to camp. After the experience at Sisters Mirror Lake, we though it most prudent to try to get at least a mile from water for camping. That worked pretty well for us last year in Washington. And it seemed to work pretty well today. Of course we were swarmed while getting water, but about a mile after that, we got away from the worst of the (choose your own expletive now) mosquitoes. 

We set up camp at a trail junction that was supposed to be at least 0.4 miles from water down a side trail. We also got lucky and had a nice breeze. The four of us were able to sit outside and eat together. In fact, this was one of the most pleasant evenings we have had on trail. 

Bunny and I had to eat as soon as we got in camp because we hadn’t eaten anything all day. We both overate at The Breakfast Club this morning which was on top of having had Five Guys burgers last night. I felt like I had a rock in my stomach all day. I’m sure Alpine Mountain Chili will help calm things down. 

Bunny and I were in our tent getting ready for bed by 7:15. Bear and Sassy managed to stay up past 7:30. We’re all worn out from our 3 days of rest. With any luck, 24 hours o& sleep will have us all feeling refreshed. 

EFG

We spent close to 10 days in Portland last year. I wanted to like it. It’s a great location. Great public transportation—easy to get around. But the homeless people! I’ve only seen more homeless people in Paris and that was because of the Syrian refugee crisis. Portland just has an “open arms” policy which is great but they need to do more than just welcome them. They need to provide some services and shelters. All the city does is allow them to stay anywhere they want, unharassed. They set up on street corners, in shop entrances, on green spaces, anywhere they want. That’s bad enough, but there’s also an associated trash and human waste problem. I was so disappointed. 

I wanted to not like Bend. I’ve constantly heard how nice it is, how the people are friendly, and how outdoor oriented the city is. Jenny drove us to the REI last week and then over to her favorite food truck by the hospital. We didn’t see a lot but the area looked very dry and desert like. I’m tired of deserts. We saw a few interesting sights while driving through town, but I didn’t get the hype. We decided we needed a few days of rest after pushing so hard to get to Sisters. We thought we would probably be able to get a ride into town from Elk Lake, so we took a chance and made hotel reservations. Worst case scenario, we’d get a couple days of rest and recovery from the trail and a break from the mosquitoes. 

The hotel we are staying at is not in the worst part of town, nor is it in the best. We got up Saturday morning and went to a diner around the corner that was open for breakfast with limited inside seating. We noticed right away that everyone was on board with wearing masks and practicing physical distancing. After breakfast, Bunny and I tried to do a little shopping close to the hotel but couldn’t find what we were looking for. We chilled for a bit in the room before venturing out again in the afternoon with Sassy while Bear napped. 

We decided to take a walk to a used equipment shop over in the old mill district. If we couldn’t find what we wanted there, we were real close to the REI. (First plus for Bend is it does have an REI). Enroute, we found what we were looking for, but we went into the equipment store to check it out. It’s in an old warehouse building which has several microbreweries and wine shops. (We like wine, second plus, actually, 3rd plus because we walked through a cute historic district to get there).  

After the three of us got done shopping, we decided to take Sassy’s advice and stop in the Bledsoe Winery for a taste. For the non football fan, Drew was the New England QB before Tom Brady. When Drew nearly died in a game from a ruptured kidney, Brady got his break. When Drew was healthy again, he couldn’t get his job back. He got traded to Buffalo and then Dallas. In the mean time, he had taken a liking to wine and bought into a winery. Today, he owns his own winery but doesn’t do anything other than occasionally press a few palms as he’s picking up his cash. He was a no show while we were there. 

The Bledsoe Winery is expensive, but the staff is very friendly. More importantly, the pours are generous. We each had a flight—only 4 wines; all dry and all red. Surprise! They were really good (4th plus) and we were a bit buzzed (now the plusses kept piling on faster than we could count). 

We called Bear and decided on a place to meet for supper. It was about a mile from us, so we walked from the Old Mill District through the Historic Old Town District to the Old Bend Downtown District. I’m sure the little buzz helped, but, damn, this is a cute town. We went to Pine Tavern for supper which was one of the places Tour Guide recommended to Bunny. It had outside seating on the Deschutes River. The building is built around two 300 year old Ponderosa Pines and has been a restaurant for over a century. Next door, on one side, was a brewery on the river with outside seating. On the other side was a coffee shop with outside seating…all on the river. We were all taken in, even Bear who hadn’t been drinking. We decided to come back in the morning to check out the coffee shop.

We started the day at the coffee shop then went for a walk in the riverside park next door. We all fell in love so we started checking out the town vitals. Bend has a population around 100,000 so it’s manageable in size. On a scale of 100 with 100 being the national average, Bend has an affordability of 132, but if you take out housing, it’s only 91 which means it’s an affordable place to live IF you can afford a house. The median price of houses is $450,000. 

We spent the next 4 hours walking from park to park and through neighborhoods along the river until we got back to the Old Mill District. We even decided to make an initial investment in the city towards buying a home. That’s right, we bought lottery tickets. If we hit, we’re moving to Bend…on the river. 

After yesterday’s walk and last night’s supper, we had already decided to stay an extra day. Mainly because we didn’t spend as much time working on the blog and videos as we should have, but also to give us more time to rest. It’s going to be hot for the next couple of days and we hope the little mosquito bastards die from heat exhaustion before we get back on trail. If we get all caught up on things, we might even do a float trip down the Deschutes. 

Walking to supper Sunday night, Bear told be to be careful of Sassy. “Someday, someone is going to mess with Sassy and she’s going to unleash on them. She’s been kickboxing and is wound up!” Little did he know that he would be the recipient of the “Wrath of Sassy.” 

While at breakfast, Bear started pushing Sassy a bit. Instinctively, without even thinking, while sitting at the table, her foot came up from under the table and made contact with Bear’s chin, tossing his head back. She then followed up with a right elbow to the nose. Sassy immediately faced forward and took a sip of coffee. I don’t even think she realized what she did. It was all very reminiscent of Jennifer Gray in “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off” when she kicked Rooney in the face 3 times before running upstairs. We had heard a huge “crack” and I thought we might need an ambulance for Bear. Fortunately, it was just his glasses. 

This all happened at 9:58a in a public restaurant. By the time we had performed triage on Bear and determined no facial bones were broken and it was just his glasses, we discovered a glasses repair place that opened at 10:00a right next door. As always, the trail provides. 

We decided to skip further activities for the day (other than walking to REI and getting ice cream) in the hopes that Sassy would relax, return to normal size and color (she had bulked up incredibly and turned green during the morning’s events). I know, I for one, will no longer push Sassy to speed up in the morning and will, henceforth, address her as ma’am when I do have to talk to her. In all fairness, we did discover Bear has woken her up early 2 consecutive days. It is well documented in the annals of this blog that Sassy is not a morning person and does not like to be disturbed early. Bear was playing with fire and got burnt.  

Bunny and I retired to our hotel room where we spent the afternoon working on defensive strategies and learning how to play dead. Sassy was like a grizzly mama and the best defense when dealing with grizzlies is absolute motionlessess. Pray for us. Forget about Bear, he’s done for. 

EFG

Mosquitoes have many effects on an outing…none of them are good. Mosquitoes are responsible for more deaths of humans than wars, religion, and politics combined. It’s estimated that of the 107 billion people who have ever lived, over 34 billion have died because of mosquitoes. The only good thing to say about them is they have never violated our civil rights and made us wear face masks. Even so, I consider them evil. 

I peed before I got in the tent to unpack last night. Bunny didn’t. Naturally, I was the first to have to get out to pee again. Bunny’s eyes are often pee-yellow when I first see them in the morning. The jaundice look is not her best, but Bunny can hold a strong candle to Dancing Dog when it comes to stubbornness. 

The mosquitoes taught me one lesson to follow after our next town stop. I am going to carry a wide mouth Gatorade bottle from here on out. When Bunny complains about being cold, I will provide her with a warm water bottle. There aren’t too many thoughtful husbands like me. 

The worst part about mosquitoes is not the itchy bite. It’s the sound. My vestibule was filled with the little bloodsuckers. There weren’t any on Bunny’s side. I think Sassy might have cut some of her hair off and spread it in my vestibule as revenge for me innocently peeing on their tent every night of the trip. The high pitched “eeeeeee” sound got louder and louder as the sun went down. It never stopped. All night long, “EEEEE.” I finally rolled Bunny over and then I could hear the mosquitoes, “eeeeee.” I can’t win. 

I made Chana Masala for supper last night. It wasn’t the good stuff from Stowaway Gourmet. It was the Mountain House version. Bunny took a few bites and said it was too hot for her. I was forced to eat the entire 2 person meal by myself. This was my saving grace. It was mostly rice, and not too juicy. The double portion of rice soaked up enough moisture from my body that I only had to make the one trip out. It was during that trip that I filtered a liter of water for the hike in today, and got the water ready for the coffee in the morning. 

I did have a very vivid dream last night. I dreamt that Bear got up to pee and Sassy was applauding. I woke up to the sounds of “slap, 13, slap, 14, slap 15…” Bear had gotten up to pee and Sassy was killing the mosquitoes that had gotten in the tent and counting each one she killed. A single pee cost 24 mosquitoes! 

When everyone woke up, we agreed to try to coordinate our tent exodus. We were to cook, eat, and completely pack inside of the tent and try to both get ready at the same time to make our escape. We got the 5 minute warning from Bear and Sassy. Bunny finally got out to get our packs out and pee while I took the tent down. Our tent is a breeze to take down in a rush; less than 2 minutes, down, folded, and stowed. Bunny and I got out of the camp and into a breeze while Bear and Sassy had only managed to get their fly off. 

The first 2 miles were slightly uphill, only a 400’ gain. Once we got to the top, 2 things happened: we had a great view of South Sister (and could see noticeably less snow) and the mosquitoes quit bothering us. The rest of the morning’s hike was easy downhill or level all the way to Elk Lake Resort. We only passed one hiker, a guy from the Netherlands who was the 4th thru-hiker we saw this year. So far, a Swedish couple were 1 & 2, a Norwegian guy was #3, and now a Netherlander is in 4th. I suppose most of the Americans returned home or got off trail when Covid closures started whereas the foreign hikers were stranded so they just kept hiking. 

There is one good thing the mosquitoes did for us, they sped us up. We covered the 7.6 miles to the resort in less than 2 1/2 hours. We just had 3 things to do (my morning constitutional window gets closed at 11 and it was now 11:30 or it might have been 4 things): eat, get our food drops, and get a hitch into Bend where we have a hotel room for the next 3 nights. The first 2 were a breeze. 

The restaurant didn’t have any outside seats that weren’t in the sun, but the bar tender, Charisma, took our orders and offered to keep refilling our drinks even if we left the restaurant to get a picnic table in the shade. She also told us how to hitch rides into Bend and gave us a marker and paper to make signs. While we were waiting for our food (3 greasy burgers and one healthy salad for yours truly) we got our food packages that Miles and Linda had left for us. 

Hitching was a different story. Charisma had told us to head towards the resort entrance and “camp” there. We sent Bunny down the road and put Sassy on the exit drive (Bear and I know how to pimp out our women). I proceeded to do the important work which works 100% of the time. I sat down on the shoulder, took out the clippers, and started cutting my nails. By the time I get my shoes off to cut my toenails, we always get a ride. I guess passing motorists see how at ease I am and figure we don’t really need the ride, so they naturally stop to offer us one. 

I got my fingernails done and we still didn’t have a ride. I was about to take off my shoes for the closer when Bear through a wrench in the works. He told me I needed to go down closer to Bunny so it looked more like 2 couples hitching. I don’t like to fix things that aren’t broke, but I complied. When I got to Bunny, she said she was tired of holding the sign and made me take it. People! Stick with the plan! I took the sign and laid in the road to stop oncoming traffic. If we’re going to deviate, let’s make it worthwhile. 

Luckily, no traffic came my way, but Bear did make puppy dog eye contact with a pickup truck. He indicated that we’d gladly ride in back. It worked. They pulled over and had 3 of us get in back while Bunny got the luxury spot inside with the dog in the back seat. I was the last in back and got handed a bag of dog poop. He told me I didn’t have to keep it, just put it in the bed. I stuck it in Sassy’s pack. 

Here’s the scoop from the luxury seat up front. Tour Guide was driving. He had sold his business a few years ago. Peanut, his wife who likes peanut M&Ms, and he own a vacation house just east of Bend. They live full time in Portland. They had been out day hiking with their dog, Winston, today. They might even have been at a Olallie when we were there last week. They are younger than us but have kids and grandkids. They started young. 

They had passed us once already and Bear could see they looked at us and wanted to give us a ride. They turned around and drove by again. When Bear indicated we would gladly ride in back, they pulled over. They were so kind to us. They even apologized that there wasn’t enough room up front because of the dog. In truth, I wanted to get up front with the dog, but I knew I’d never hear the end of it if both women were forced to be in back while I rode up front. No one loves dogs more than I do in this group. Life isn’t always fair. 

Tour Guide said he’d take us wherever we wanted. We told him the hotel. He said he didn’t know where it was, but Peanut would look it up and he’d take us directly there. We got there about an hour before our room was ready because of disinfecting. 

John had contacted us a couple days back about possibly hiking with us for a few days. I know he’s very protective of Jenny and any potential exposure of Covid since she already has some respiratory issues. I told him we start late, go slow, and we’re going to go into Bend for a few days. Even though we plan to sleep most of the time and get caught up on the blog, I knew our exposure potential would be an issue. I didn’t want to mislead him. When we got in town, he had said he was going to hike in a more remote area than the PCT. it would have been great to have him go with us, but we were all a bit intimidated by John and were worried we’d be too slow for him. If this damn Covid wasn’t an issue, we’d have had a great time. Next time, for sure. 

Once we got in our rooms, we took care of town necessities (showers and laundry) before we headed out to a pizza place for supper. The trail provides. 

EFG

Even though we all slept fairly well (the one exception was when I had cramps in both legs when I tried to take my socks off in the middle of the night), we were a bit sluggish getting out of camp. One big disadvantage of our camp was that the trail ran all around it so finding a private spot to despoil took care. It seemed like no matter where one dug, it was possible to be seen from someone hiking on the trail. I was ready to resort to direct eye contact with passing hikers to create discomfort, but I was fortunate and found a hiking lull. 

We started hiking on snow right away. We were expecting it. We asked almost every nobo hiker about it. We checked postholer.com every time we got enough signal. It was 100% consensus that we would cross snow and none of it was sketchy. That didn’t satisfy us. We wanted someone to tell us we were going to die. All it did was slow us down. A lot. 

It appears that hiking sobo has a big gotcha with snow. The north sides of mountains are not as exposed to much sun. Nobo hikers get to swish on down the snow but sobo hikers have to trudge up the snow covered north slopes. Our biggest climb of the day was pretty much out of the box. The sun was shining and we were sweating. The more you sweat, the more you drink. The harder you climb, the more calories you burn. After a mere 2.5 miles we needed water and a snack. 

As often happens, we stopped too soon for our break. We followed the creek where we drew our water from for about 1/4 mile before it turned into a nice 100’ waterfall. There were already 4 other people at the base of the falls; this was all in the Obsidian Limited Entry Area when we hit our snow and the creek. We try to play by the Covid rules so we continued on. 

I, being the designated expendable member of the party, was out front leading. Ahead, I noticed 2 hikers coming towards us wearing huge face masks. As they approached, what I thought were face masks morphed into long beards—these were obvious thru-hikers. I started quizzing them only to discover I knew one of the hikers, Wolverine. We had met Wolverine last year at Warner Springs barely 100 miles into our thru-hike attempt. Like us, Wolverine has been reduced to LASHer status. He made it to Diamond Mountain last year before he ran out of time. This year, he wanted to attempt another thru-hike, but when forced off the trail because of Covid-19, he decided to pick up where he left off and head to Canada. 

While Bunny and I were talking to Wolverine, Bear started conversing with his travel companion, Spoon. Sassy was feeling left out and wasn’t feeling well so she sat down. When we looked over at her, she was about to fall over from the heat. We wrapped up our conversations and got Sassy into the shade.  Since Sassy needed some recovery time and we had some cellular signal, we decided to take the time to try to find a hotel for a few nights in Bend.

I am officially invoking my card carrying male privilege and suspending Bear’s “male status” pending further review. Bear wants the “perfect” item when he shops (for anything). He wants to compare: location, price, customer reviews, websites to see if someone has a better deal, etc. It’s like shopping with my aunt that has been to the same store every week for the last 10 years, but still insists on picking up every item and inspecting all labels each time. I am a certified male. I find the best option I can come up with in less than two minutes and never look back. I found a hotel within my 2 minute limit and sat with my finger over the “confirm booking” button until even Sassy, laying on the ground near death, said “good enough, book it Easy.” I was so excited to have a confirmed room in Bend that I had to wear bandaids on my nipples the rest of the day. 

Having a confirmed hotel was all it took to perk this group up. We’ve only had one day of so far on this trip with John and Jenny. We enjoyed every minute we spent with them, but we need some pure relaxation, sit in the nude, turn down the AC and sleep time. We still had 11 miles to go and out pace picked up. Admittedly, this was not a high bar to clear sine we had taken 4 1/2 hours to cover the first 5 miles. 

I will admit, Bear and I are lucky guys to hike with two tough women. I’ll even go so far as to say Sassy is a bad ass. I can’t bestow that title on Bunny, yet, and it’s doubtful that will happen any time soon. For that to happen, 3 things need to change: 1) she needs to not crawl under me whenever there is a thunderstorm (she’s so bad, she converted my once brave Great Pyrenees into locking herself in a dark closet during storms), 2) she needs to not scream like a little girl whenever she sees a snake (I’d allow it on poisonous snakes to be cowardly, but a little garter snake in a water hole almost cost me an arm), and 3) to not break down when a couple of ants crawl into her shoe (we searched for 10 minutes to find the tossed shoe). 

There are two General summer seasons in Oregon. The first we experienced the first two days on the trail…cold, miserable, and drizzly. I’ve been hoping we could avoid entering the second season. We have had a few glimpses of it at Breitenbush Camp and a couple other random places, but we hiked full on into second summer season today, known locally as Mosquito Hell.  

The little mother f#$&ers began in earnest the last mile of our day as we dropped of a high plateau beside South Sister. They are evil, pure and simple. They watch and learn unprotected spots. The preferred locale of torture is the back of your neck, the back of exposed legs, the back of your arms, and for sheer enjoyment, they’ll fly in your ears just to make sure you know you’ve been targeted. 

When we arrived at our camp, I had already donned my head net and slathered all of my exposed flesh with Jean Luc Picardin. It had little effect. We were in a swarm worse than the invading alien fighter in Independence Day. I was sure Sassy would be taken out in the initial attack (even bad asses die eventually). As it was, we sat up our tents as fast as possible and climbed in with all our gear. Once inside, we killed every little bastard/bitch that made it in with us. We stayed in our tents all evening until after dark hoping against hope for some relief. It never came. They knew they had us. We’d all eventually have to pee. 

EFG