Category: 2019 Pacific Crest Trail

Someone cowboy camping in the picnic pavilion talked and yelled in his sleep. Whenever I fell asleep on my back, I could hear rain falling on the tent until Bunny would elbow my ribs and make me roll over. There was a party across the lake. Park rangers were using blow horns to divert traffic. In spite of all these interruptions to my sleep, I woke up refreshed. 

We were far enough from everyone that I could get on with my morning ritual of preparing my lucky wife her breakfast in bed which she has not only come to expect, but now demands. If I oversleep by even a single minute, she beats me. I’ve trained myself to wake up before the alarm rather than get boxed in my ears. I’m my wife’s bee-atch with absolutely no freewill left to me. Every morning, I make coffee and hope that Bunny is happy with my efforts. Today, we had enough water that I was able to prepare her athletic greens which she favors above all else. Please, send greens for my wife and help for me. I hope she doesn’t censor my pleas like she usually does. 

The pizza infusion into the hiking community enabled everyone to wake up happy and refreshed. Almost. Bunny was not pleased. I reminded her we had porcelain and running water and that did help her mood a bit. It was the leftover Sprite which saved me, though. The extra sugar gave her the energy to fake being happy to all who saw her. I quivered in fear as I usually do. 

It was supposed to be an easy day of hiking to Cajon Pass. Fake News had told us he had reserved a room at the Best Western and asked if we wanted the other bed. I didn’t know how the day would turn out. Would Bunny want to sleep in a soft bed, do laundry, and shower? Or would she prefer to make me sleep on the ground in a tent where no one can hear my screams of agony? Tough call to make. We exchanged phone numbers and I said we’d contact him when we made it to the pass. 

The hike really wasn’t that bad today, but Bunny has run out of herbs, or as she calls it, her CBD oil. Her hips were not doing well today. We only averaged 1.5 mph for the first couple of hours, but when we made it over the hurdle of our first big climb out of Cleghorn Picnic Area into the adjacent valley, her hips had loosened up enough that she was her usual walking machine (kind of creaky and needing oil, but moving nonetheless). 

Yet again, we passed a small group performing true trail magic. A father and his two sons had just recently adopted a 6 mile section of the PCT and they were out today, on Easter Sunday, grooming their trail. We thanked them for all their effort and complimented them on the high quality of trail  I encourage everyone to do the same whenever you meet trail workers. This is really the only payment they receive. Without them, we can’t thru-hike.

We passed no one for the first 10 miles today. Once we climbed up to the rim of Cajon Pass, we saw Sun Bear and Cheers having lunch and admiring the view. We climbed on up to their vantage point and lost our collective breaths. I remember driving down I-15 a few weeks back and I was scared shitless when we dropped off the high plateau into this pass at 65 mph. I didn’t do much better today at 2.75 mph. 

This is one of the most amazing views we have seen on the entire trip so far. Every direction is a postcard. The expansiveness of the area is mind boggling. We let Sun Bear and Cheers finish their lunch and continued down. Only now, Bunny has the smell of dead cow in her nostrils. She truly was a killer Bunny with huge nasty teeth that only a Big Mac could tame. I couldn’t keep up. 

She started passing people like they were old men and she was a young healthy woman. First was Snow Dog (mid 60s) and then Strider (also, mid 60s). The approaching McDonalds was enough to transform my 80 year old wife to a young woman of 39 (umpteen times). You’re missing the point if you only notice that she’s passing older people. Look beyond the age and notice that she is passing people. This is a new phenomena I haven’t seen before. We didn’t have to hurt or injure them for us to pass. (Their shoes did that to them but that detail is not important…we’re passing people!)

We arrived at McDonalds a full 30 minutes earlier than we had thought we were going to when we left camp this morning. We averaged exactly 2 mph, making up the slow time we experienced the first 2 hours of hiking. It was only 2:30. Granted, everyone else we knew was already inside finishing up their meals. McDonalds had cordoned off a side of the restaurant for hiker use in an attempt to isolate the smell (to no avail). In our defense, as bad as we smelled, I could still smell the strong odor of the restroom when I went in. We are no worse than raw sewage. In fact, several degrees less. Who needs showers more than once a week?

It turns out, we do. We decided to see if Fake News still had the extra bed available. We couldn’t get hold of him, so we just got our own room for the night. My hygiene standards are slightly better than most third world inhabitants, but I was to the point of needing a shower and clean clothes to feel human again. After those priorities were satisfied, we ventured out to the world of fine dining once again—gas station Del Taco. Society has been berry berry good to me. 

EFG

I heard ADL (All Day Long) packing up so I thought I’d check the time and, possibly, pee. It was only 5:30. I chose to do neither. At 6, the option of sleep was gone until the suggestion of pee was resolved. I thought everyone had gotten up and left but Fake News, Prometheus, and Not a Minor were all still asleep. I quietly made breakfast but everyone else mysteriously woke up. 

By 8, Cheers, Sun Bear, and Jukebox caught up just as we were all getting ready to leave. The missing trio had slept at the creek just below the Mojave Dam. We all had a common goal for the day—pizza at Cleghorn Picnic Area. First priority for Bunny and me was water. We were completely out with only a mile and a half to a seasonal stream. 

After we got water, we pretty much fell behind everyone else. The amazing thing for us was that we did leapfrog with several hikers that we knew so we could talk to people periodically throughout the day. It was an easy walk on the side of some small mountains. If we had taken the road instead, it would have only been a six mile day. I kept looking across the valley at a wall of mountains on the other side, only it wasn’t really mountains. It was the edge of a plane that was elevated. On top of the plane was the high desert we have already crossed. I was fascinated with the plateau and kept wondering if we were walking along a fault line. 

I am enjoying meeting everyone but I still feel like an outsider. Most of these people have been hiking together for at least 3-4 weeks while we were ahead crossing the desert above Acton. The flip/flopping that we are doing makes it harder for us to develop a lasting trail family. The most we will hike with any of these people is about 120 miles before we skip ahead again. 

We witnessed savagery on the trail like I have never seen before. Bunny was in the lead, but when she made a turn in the trail she stopped dead. Of course, I thought she was farting, but then she started backpedaling. I looked over her shoulder and was shocked my two full grown males engaged in what appeared to be a fight to the death. One was bleeding from his shoulder and the other was limping. I tried to get them to stop, but didn’t want to get in the middle lest I become a target. Bunny covered her eyes as the shoulder bleeder made a lunge at the neck of the other successfully rolling him down the ground and breaking his neck. Fortunately for us, they had rolled off the trail under the brush so we could continue on. Bunny almost cried at the savagery, but I reminded her this was lizard mating season and things can get ugly when testosterone is flowing. 

Even with breaks, we covered the 13.5 miles in under 6 hours. That could mean we are getting stronger and faster, but it doesn’t. It means the terrain was very easy. 250’ of elevation change per mile might not sound like much, but imagine climbing a 25 story building every mile. You’re right, it’s not much and that’s why we were so fast. We walked below another earthen dam today. This is the dam that created Silverwood Lake in the San Bernardino Mountains. This is the highest reservoir in the state and the first location where we can order pizza on the trail. Guess which fact is the most attractive to thru-hikers. 

IF we could hike this pace normally, we wouldn’t be worried about finishing this trail or even the CDT in a single season. When we arrived at Cleghorn, there was already 15 other hikers waiting that we know and have hiked with in the last 3 days. I’m beginning to get the same feeling of comradery that we were feeling around the NOC last year on the AT. We are all sharing a common experience out of the norm of society that few people outside of the hiking community can comprehend. It’s been 5 days since any of us has washed their underwear and now we get pizza!

Fake News offered us beer as soon as he saw us. Snow Dog delivered beers directly to us before we could even get our packs off our backs. We were greeted by Sun Bear, Strider, ADL, and Casper. I ordered pizza before I popped the top on my beer. The pizza place said they’d rush the order so we could get ours at the same time everyone else did. 

We spent the next hour talking with everyone and chilling on the ground with beer until the food arrived. More hikers kept trickling in throughout the afternoon. The picnic area closes to the general public at 8, but they allow thru-hikers to camp and use the restrooms all night. All that is asked is that we get out early in the morning. Sun Bear built a fire in one of the grills once the sun started setting and the temperature was dropping. Even though we had run of the place, with a full stomach and a few beers in me, I did manage to hold out to almost 8:30. I’m reverting to my college, night owl, persona. 

EFG

Two, not one, but two beautiful latrines available for defilement. The rumors of free toilet paper proved to be just that, rumors. There was evidence that it probably would have been true even as late as yesterday. I found myself so confident and excited yet could not muster the wherewithal to fire at will. I felt like Kahn when he discovered he had been tricked by Kirk. I let go a Kahn-like “NNOOOO!” That primordial yell was just what was needed to release the damn. I walked back to the tent where Bunny was packing up singing in a superb baritone “🎶 Oh what a beautiful morning. Oh what a beautiful day… 🎶”

Bunny was not amused because I had been gone so long that she had actually had to do some of the things I normally take care of. Plus, she hates it if I’m too happy in the morning. She practically knocked me down grabbing her toilet paper before she disappeared. A few minutes later, she reappeared singing in a passable trail soprano “🎶 Oh what a beautiful morning. Oh what a beautiful day… 🎶” I can only assume success. 

It turns out that all the unexpected trail comforts we found at Splinters Cabin actually slowed us down. Convenient water meant we drank more for breakfast. A picnic table caused us to spread out more while we packed. A trash can at hand led to multiple trips across the grounds. A privy increased a quit squat to a leisurely sit (no “h” included intentionally). We didn’t get on the trail until 8:30. 

I neglected to mention the fact that we surpassed 500 cumulative trail miles, yesterday. With all the jumping around, it’s tougher to keep track of mileage. Last year, while we were watching our feet to keep from falling, we would notice someone had created a marker in the trail. This year, we’re looking around and not counting anything. I’m much more laid back, purity wise, so I’m not paying attention. 

We did experience a PCT first for us today. I was afraid we were going to make it all the way through the desert without seeing a rattlesnake, but our drought is over. I rounded a curve and heard a loud rattle. I told Bunny to back up while I looked around for the source. He was sitting about 3’ in front of me to the left watching me. Once we made eye contact, and he was sure I was not being aggressive, he turned and headed into the grass. It was a good thing my Kahn yell had cleared my bowels earlier this morning.

The highlight for the day was a hot springs which was just 9.5 miles in for us. I was hopeful because locals tend to hang out and party here. More importantly, they do so, clothing optional. This actually proved quite handy because I saw a few hour glass figures with long flowing hair walking away from me, to only be surprised with the wrong plumbing when they turned around. There were plenty of schlongs for Bunny to pretend to not look at so I could pretend to not look in other directions. I will say, there was plenty of evidence of our national support for the state of Israel.

I think, as a society, we have done too good of a job bolstering the younger generations self worth of their bodies in whatever form. Like no child left behind, some kids are stupid and need to be left behind. Every body is beautiful; I think not. Some bodies should remain covered in public. I would have taken pictures to prove my point, but either my wife, or some of the burly, tattooed, behemoths would surely have pummeled me. 

We stayed at the hot springs for over an hour and a half eating lunch and talking with other thru-hikers we knew. It was like watching scrambled TV while sitting there, you couldn’t really see anything, but every now and then, a few lines come in focus just enough that you think you might have seen something you’re not supposed to. 

Today was hot. It got to over 90 and we spent most of the day walking in full sun. Before the springs, Bunny got to feeling delirious (which is the only reason I think she was willing to stay as long as we did). By the time we got rehydrated and cooled off, it was even hotter than when we arrived, but we needed to make miles. As we were getting ready to leave with Jukebox, Sun Bear, and Cheers, Jukebox was complaining about chafing on her back and asked Cheers for some of her Vaseline. I’m a man with a mission when it comes to chafing and I told her to ditch the jelly and try some of my Vagisil. Real men carry Vagisil and let people know. 

A mile or two later when we stopped at another stream to cool down, Jukebox came in as we were pushing on. She told me she was throwing away her body glide and buying Vagisil when she got to town. This made the group of day hikers a little uncomfortable and helped put a bit of pep in their step as they left the stream. 

All Day Long has told us that the river crossing below the Mojave Dam might be pretty deep so we were leery as we approached it. We had been leapfrogging with another girl, Bane, all day long. As we were getting ready to go in, she just leaped past us again without hesitation and went across. No problem. We were hoping to find camping spots on the other side, but there weren’t any. We hiked on another mile and a half before catching up with Prometheus, Not a Minor, All Day Long, Fake News, and Bane. It was still another mile and a half to the next water source, but everyone was tired. We had just grabbed a couple of liters of water from a cache thinking we didn’t have enough energy in our legs for another couple of miles. We joined them. 

They had been waiting for Sun Dog, Cheers, Jukebox, Snow Dog, and Strider who we had last seen about 5 miles back. We shared what information we had about the missing hikers as we cooked supper. Except for us and Bane, everyone else is cowboy camping. With the rattlesnake sighting, today, and Ivy’s encounter with a scorpion, we just aren’t ready to forsake that 0.002” protective enclosure we call a tent. 

EFG

I still can’t figure this damn alarm out. I thought I had it set to vibrate only. We were camped right next to Double Take and Kilo and I didn’t want to wake them up when I was supposed to start the coffee for my wife. Since we went to bed at 6:15 last night, I was already awake and waiting to see if I had it figured out. I didn’t. We managed to get out of camp by 8 with them still in their tent. 

I was pretty down today. Partly due to the manner in which we got ditched, but when I reflected on how we left Cheesy Turtle at Paradise Cafe I felt a little hypocritical. I’ve decided to just it go. What was really bothering me was that we had a friend suddenly die a few weeks ago and I was afraid it might have been suicide. We received confirmation yesterday that that was the case. I’ve known at least a half dozen people who have committed suicide and each time it happens, I feel like I have been a shitty friend or relative that didn’t offer enough assistance. 

The terrain was not bad at all today (as evidenced by our near 20 mileage). We got a little bit of everything on the trail today—snow crossings, desert walking, cold temperatures to start off with a pretty hot afternoon, lots of water available on the trail, and a couple of water crossings requiring acrobatic skills or at least changing into water shoes to cross. But what I needed was a real pick-me-up to turn my day around. The trail provides. 

After a crossing where we lost the trail because we chose to walk upstream to find a crossing that didn’t require us taking off our shoes, we saw a sobo hiker coming towards us. Whenever I run into someone coming from the direction we’re headed, I try to get as much trail information as possible. I’m particularly interested in Mt Baden Powell trail conditions, as that’s our next major obstacle. While I was inundating the sobo with questions, I noticed a white blaze on his cap, so I asked him when he hiked the AT. Last year!

I dropped my pack and told Bunny to drop hers, we had to find our connections. I started with the obvious first family for us: Stickers, Lady Bug, Mizman, Geo, Summit…no connection. Gray had started in early March and finished in early September so we had to cross paths. I tried some middle trail friends and got a bite on Rampage, Savage, and Po, but he didn’t meet them until the Whites in NH. He started asking me about what hikes we had done. Halfway through my list, he said Boiling Springs, PA. I said we were hiking with Grey Squirrel, ET, and Wallaby then. Jackpot. He knew all of them. But it gets better. 

When we got into Boiling Springs, we had gone to the Mexican Restaurant to eat on their patio. We met a young guy and he invited us to join him at his table. He was having some guacamole and offered us some. When he got ready to leave, I said we’d get it since we had eaten almost as much as he. Who was this random hiker? Gray, the sobo we were talking to right now. We had actually eaten dinner together. This was the pick-me-up I needed to make me feel good again. It really is a small hiking world. 

Double Take and Kilo caught up to us while we were talking to Gray. We were about 13 miles into the day and I had been thinking about stopping but now that I was stoked, we decided to push on to a picnic area rumored to have pit latrines with (drum roll…hiker jackpot) toilet paper in them. I tried to talk them into 3 more miles than they had planned but in the end, they decided 16 was enough. 

After we left them behind at Bench Camp where we were originally shooting for, Bunny and I started dragging. We were both out of water and had no energy. We started recounting what we had eaten today. Breakfast was light (just granola with carnation instant breakfast and a slice of bacon—Bunny is rationing the bacon). Since then, I had eaten a bag of nuts with 400 calories and a tuna salad sandwich which was only about 170 calories. Bunny had eaten less that that. It was Snickers time. 

The extra 250 calories was enough for us to knock out the final 2 miles. When we got to Splinters Cabin, there were 3 guys with tents set up already. We were very relieved because one note said “no camping allowed.” If were going to join the outlaw side of society, we at least want to be part of a gang. One of the guys had also hiked the AT last year, but he was a “red shirt” to us because he had completed the trail in less than 4 1/2 months. No one we knew was in this lightening fast category. 

We set up our tent, then Bunny did the homemaking while I retrieved water and cooked supper. We have our own picnic table right next to our tent. We are on a point of land between 2 heavily flowing creeks so there’s the sound of rushing water (hopefully my bladder is dehydrated). There are trash cans here. It’s a full moon tonight and I can see the privies glowing in the moonlight on the other side of the picnic shelter. We are living “Hiker Nirvana.”

EFG

Every time we get ready to leave a town, I look for an excuse to stay another day. Before we went to bed last night, Bunny said if it was raining or snowing, she wasn’t getting up. I wanted her to have her much needed rest today. I could hear the wind blowing hard when I woke up. I was hopeful for her, but when I looked out, I could only see blue skies and sunshine. Damn our luck. 

We met Wolf and Blue’s Clues for breakfast at 7:30. BC has been wanting a Lumberjack Slam for a couple of weeks, so we felt the lad had finally earned it. The hotel we are staying at has a 9 o’clock shuttle back to the trailhead which BC had already signed us up for. We leisurely stuffed ourselves knowing that we had plenty of time to finish up our packing and enjoy our porcelain one last time. 

The shuttle dropped us off and the seven of us in it were hiking at 9:17. Bunny and I generously allowed everyone to start before us figuring that this would save us having to step off the trail as each one passed us. Of course, Wolf was first down the trail with BC hot on his tail. We never saw them again. 

Our target campsite was just a little over 13 miles out. If we are staying on schedule to finish by October 1, we should be right at 687.5 miles in at the end of today. Instead, we are exactly 487 miles in. We are running a deficit of 200 miles. We have to pick up our game a bit and start erasing our deficit, as well as start to run a surplus to “pay” for any additional zero days we plan to take. The possibility of jumping to Oregon would help by giving us some better terrain to make up miles as well as eliminating the need to finish by mid-September (which would add another 187.5 miles to our deficit). For now, we’ll be happy that we reduced our shortage by 0.6 miles today—baby steps. 

We expected to have a lot of people pass us today, but it didn’t happen. Has the bubble finally burst and we’re spreading out? The trail and terrain today were very reasonable. We could easily have shot for 17 miles and made it to another water source. However, the plan was to carry water 4 miles to our camp tonight. I hate to carry more than a liter of water, but if I do, I’m going to use it and not dump it. We considered not getting more than a liter of water and pushing on, but we didn’t want to change plans unilaterally. 

Leaving Big Bear, we did only carry 1 liter each. The first water source was 9 miles in. We had only seen a few day hikers on the trail, but when we stopped to fill up, 5 other thru-hikers quickly caught up to us. We met Sun Bear who we had camped with at Strawberry Camp. We also met another couple we had ridden the shuttle with this morning, Kilo and Double Take. They are planning on going to the same campsite as we are. How could there be this many people behind us and none of them are passing us? Could we possibly be getting stronger?

It was only 4.2 miles to camp after water. Since we were first at the stream, we the first to leave, but we fully expected everyone to pass us soon enough. It didn’t happen that way. We met a local out for a day hike and slowly walked and talked with Tom for about 1/2 mile. He was originally from Orange County but had moved up here 15 years ago to raise their kids in a less hectic environment. When we left him at Cougar Crest Trail which leads back down to Big Bear, no one had passed us yet. Curiouser and curiouser. 

Now we only had a mile and a half to camp. We got to where we thought the camp would be, but didn’t see anyone. Perhaps Wolf and BC had been going so fast they missed the turn and headed down Cougar Crest. That didn’t seem likely. We checked our Gut and saw that we had actually walked past the camp. We went back, but, still, no one was there. We tried texting and calling Wolf and BC but got no replies. We decided to stick with the plan and set up camp. We hadn’t carried 5+ liters of water to walk on to the next water source. 

We looked around to see if we had missed a note or any signs. It’s not like Wolf to deviate from a plan. Eventually, we did get a text message from him in reply to our phone calls and texts. They had decided to push on another 6 miles to the next camp. We always knew it was just a matter of time before they ditched us. We start each day with the understanding that when we say goodbye in the morning, it could be the last goodbye. Now, with Ivy gone, it has happened. Our first PCT tramily has bit the dust. 

Something else interesting happened today. After having a permanent hiking companion for over 2 years, whom we thought we knew well, we were shocked to learn everything we knew about that companion has been in error. I’m talking, of course, of Bunny’s bunny. Today, out of the blue, he announced that he is really a she and wants to be called “Beatrix” henceforth. In all honesty, we have always respected bunny’s privacy and never thoroughly checked between “her” legs. My world is turning upside down. 

We should probably have pushed on. We found ourselves completely done with everything that needed to be done by 5. It is nice to not be rushed, but it’s kind of boring sitting in camp with over 2 hours of sunlight remaining. From now on, we will probably hike until 5 before setting up camp. We’ll kick up our daily average to the 16-18 mile range until we get to Acton. In the mean time, we’ll try to figure out where we’re going to flop to next. All I’ve got is Bunny and Beatrix—the hormonal shift is palatable. 

EFG

While doing laundry yesterday, we met a Hungarian hiker, Camino Steve. His goal is to hike both the AT and the PCT this year while he has a 6 month visa. He’s older than we are. While I was waiting for the dryer, he told me he had started the AT around the 12th of February and had gotten off to start the PCT after 6 weeks. I asked him how far he had gotten. He replied “just to Harpers Ferry.” Wiki Task Force! That’s the half way point. I asked him when he thought he’d make it to Acton (the end point of this section for us, were planning 2 weeks), he said 4 & 1/2 days. Wiki Task Wiki Task Force! This guy is faster than Blue’s Clues, who hiked over 4mph yesterday. 

This town stop proved a costly one to our tramily. It is the start of the end. Ivy had to go home for a week, or there abouts, to complete her exit from the Air Force. We said our goodbyes after we had one last breakfast together, this morning. Blue’s Clues will be leaving us when we get to Acton as he wants to wait for the Sierra to melt enough to safely continue north. He’s fast enough, he can afford the delay. “And Then There Were Three” Can anyone name that group?

We are approaching 480 miles on the PCT so far this year. That means we are down to just the length of the Appalachian Trail remaining. Hold it, we’ve been hiking over 50 days and still have almost 2200 miles left yet Bunny wants to be done by mid-September AND take time off to go to her son’s graduation from Army Basic Training. Bunny has to pick up the pace and carry me or something must change. Doc gave us the idea yesterday while driving us to our hotel…Ashland, OR. 

We’ve got a couple weeks to check out the plan, but this may be what we have to do. Jump to Ashland when we reach Acton and then hike north to Canada. If all goes well with this plan (and there are a lot of details to work out) we will arrive in time to spend a couple of days with Camino Pete before we fly to Atlanta, GA to go to graduation and then flying back to Ashland to (hold onto your asses because this one puckers mine) HIKE SOBO TO WALKER PASS. 

I can’t wrap my head around becoming sobo scum but Mizman did it last year and he wasn’t too warped from the experience. We are flopping around like a fish out of water. What the hell, let’s do it all and hike the wrong direction while we’re at it. It does allow us to put the Sierras last. Hopefully, the 40 year maximum snow pack will be melted by then. It also removes the mid-September deadline that WA places on us with its unpredictable early snows. We might even be able to extend our hike end date to my birthday to allow me to at least have the same numerical number of years as my wife (yet still remain the younger man that I am).

EFG

Enjoy episode #8 of our journey

Today is always a day we look forward to—town day! After a week out, we are craving beds, chairs, showers, porcelain, and food that doesn’t require boiling water to eat. Prometheus was one of the first up and rebuilt the fire to give everyone extra incentive to get out of their tents (not that it was needed). Bunny and I were the 3rd and 4th (out of approximately 20 hikers) out of camp, right at 8. We were trying to get a leg up on Blue’s Clues today. 

One of the ways we make it out early is by cheating on the morning routine. Since it’s a town day, I know porcelain is waiting and I have bowel control extraordinaire, knowing that I’m just 10 miles and a hitch from relief. I am married to an older woman who lacks the same self control. Less than half an hour down the trail, we had to pull into the woods for Bunny to leave her tracks behind. I took the opportunity to call to the Vintage Lakeside Lodge and make room reservations for us. This is also when Ivy caught up and passed us. The older Bunny bowels are of mixed worth to us. 

We quickly descended several hundred feet down the valley to return to a transition zone between alpine and desert. We came to a road junction and accidentally took a wrong turn for a couple hundred feet. This actually turned out to be a crucial mistake which will have repercussions for us in town as will soon be seen. 

The mountain range we are in is a fairly barrow range, only 4 or 5 ridges wide. We crossed past the middle of the range yesterday and are walking just one ridge from the edge of the range. This means we only have a single ridge between us and open desert. This also gives us a rare combination of Joshua Trees and pine trees living right next to each other. As with yesterday, there is no water after we leave the alpine zone after the first couple of miles. 

We met one sobo day hiker that told us he had passed 18 people heading north since he got on the trail at 8. We only knew of 4 people ahead of us that left camp before us. Other than Ivy, no one had passed us all morning (or so we thought). Bunny’s track leaving did not do the trick for her stomach, so we were forced to take another break. We only had 4 miles left at 10:30 when the old gal started breaking down.

Still, no one passed us. We were certain we would have seen Blue’s by now. We were starting to get a little worried about him, but secretly happy and confident that we were going to make it to town before him. We caught up with another hiker that we could see was physically struggling. When we caught up with him, we finally recognized him as Keith who we had met last evening. He is going to have to get off trail for a while and return home to Colorado to allow his back to recuperate. He has had multiple surgeries in the past and recognizes when issues are starting up. 

Meanwhile, Wolf had texted us that he couldn’t get a hitch. I thought he was just impatient like Bunny tends to be when more than 2 cars pass and she doesn’t get a ride. We were only a mile and a half away so I felt confident we’d walk up just as he and Ivy got lifts. Just before the road, we ran into a lot of trail magic in the form of cold sodas and water. Bunny and I each grabbed a soda and walked out to the road. Only Keith was there. 

Just as we walked up to the parking lot, a car pulled up, turned around to drop off a hiker, and asked us if we needed a ride into town. Tough hitch? We hadn’t even made it to the road yet to stick out our thumb proving once again that being early doesn’t help in the least. The three of us gladly accepted. 

Doc had hiked the PCT last year and decided to come to Big Bear City after he finished. He’s paying back by giving trail magic to this year’s hikers. He offered to take Keith to Papa Smurph’s Place to spend the night (the same Papa Smurph that keeps the water cache right where I needed it yesterday). He also offered to take us all the way to our hotel. 

After we dropped off Keith, I asked Doc if we could stop at the Post Office to pick up a couple packages. We had an order from REI and my new pack from Osprey sent to the wrong town. Doc agreed to stop so we killed two problems with one ride. I had sent my pack to Osprey for repair or replacement after last year’s AT thru-hike. I really thought they’d replace it, but they chose to repair it instead. It’s really falling apart now so I called them in Idyllwild and they said they’d have it waiting here for me in a Big Bear (and they did).

When Doc dropped us off, Ivy was waiting to check in. The office was closed until 1 which was just a few minutes away. Wolf came up already checked in and showered. We told them we had no idea what happened to Blue’s as he never passed us. Wolf told us he was in the shower right now. We couldn’t believe it. We had never left the trail (until Ivy reminded us of the wrong turn which gave Blue’s the opportunity to pass us). The damn young legs did it again. 

It was early and we already had our Post Office dilemma taken care of, so number 1 priority was…(food, shower, laundry, more food?) Food, of course. All else in due time. Food is always first (unless we find a hotel with a swim up restaurant and bar).

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It was a late night in camp. I don’t things quieted down until almost 8:15. That’s a good half hour past sunset. We’re getting in with a wild crowd. There was a study I saw in Outside Magazine just before we started this hike. Boiled down to its essence, it stated that human flatulence increases with altitude. I can confirm this through personal observation. By 8:30 it sounded like the “bean scene” from “Blazing Saddles.” 

With almost 20 people camping around us last night, guess who was last out of camp. Wrong! It wasn’t us. There were at least 2 other people still in camp when we left. I’m sure the honors went to GloWorm. He is an overweight hiker who takes a daily picture of himself in his speedos and posts it to his Instagram. He is trying to document his weight loss along the trail. If he catches up with us again, Blue’s Clues and I are going to pose with him. 

I have developed another comparison between the AT and the PCT. The trail marks (white blazes) on the AT is the needy girlfriend that keeps telling you how much she loves you and that she’s there for you (except for in the Smokies and the Whites when she’s a little hormonal). There are white blazes everywhere making sure you never lose sight of the trail.  The PCT markings are more like a guy that tells you he loves you until further notice. The only time you hear anything again is if you see him talking to a girl at a bar and then he says he loves you again—that would be a road or trail crossing. There just aren’t confidence markers along the trail for miles at a time. You often find yourself wondering if you’re still on the trail. 

Even though we only hiked 10 miles yesterday, we were completely beat down. Bunny and I both fell once bringing the tally to: Bunny 3, Easy 2. This is only one less for each of us than we fell on the entire 2200 miles of AT last year. We needed an easier today, and we got it. The weather was great to just a little warm in the afternoon. There wasn’t much snow on the trail. Just a few non-life threatening patches over a couple of miles. We stayed above 8000’ elevation all day bouncing as high as 8700’ a couple of times. It was a good day except for one minor problem—see paragraph 1 of this post. Flatulence at elevation. 

We developed a new game today called “fart to the rear.” The rules are very simple. If the person leading farts loud enough that the person following hears it, the leader has to go to the rear to not fart in the face of the follower. The problem is that we are both experiencing a high flatulence rate. The game was so effective that it was actually slowing our hiking pace down while we waited to switch positions so often. Bunny experienced the shortest lead time when she couldn’t even hold out to switch positions. 

I feel it is necessary to give a refresher on hiking with Bunny. If she is walking and slows down gradually to a stop, she is just catching her breath. If she is walking and stops abruptly, look out! She lured me in with a new technique today of staring up into the trees. I thought she saw a new kind of bird and got lured in. BAM, I got a full snout full of stink. She then laughs like Snidely Whiplash and moves along. The interesting thing about Bunny is that she’s not mean about her technique. Even if I’m way in front, she’ll abruptly stop, fart loudly, laugh out loud, and start walking again. This is a very obvious “tell.”

While we were walking along today trying to figure out the source of our gas, Bunny said it’s her body rebelling to all the processed food we’ve been eating. We both agreed that we could use some more fresh fruit and vegetables in our trail diets. Less than 10 minutes after saying this, we came to a road crossing and saw a van. The driver rolled down his window and yelled to us. I’ve prepared my whole life on how to react if a guy in a van pulls up to the playground and asks us if we want candy…I run and tell the authorities and don’t go near the van. This guy yelled and asked if we wanted some fruit. We dropped our packs and ran to the van like moths to an open flame. 

Diamond Dave has been doing trail magic for years. He lives in the area and is planning to retire within the next year. He was actually listening to hiking vlogs when we got to the van. Between talking to hikers and vlogs, he is doing research in preparation for his thru-hike which he will be attempting after he retires. We sat and talked about shoes and socks for about 20 minutes. We were ready for a break and the fruit, but the pressure was building in both of us so we had to hit the trail and spare Diamond Dave the noxious fumes. 

This section of trail today was completely dry. We each carried 2 liters of water with us, but I drank all of mine with 5 miles still to hike. Bunny yelled to me from behind that her flatulence was turning into something more substantial and that we needed to stop. I saw a nice sitting log ahead and said I’d wait for her there. By now, I was pretty thirsty and wanted some water. When I got to the log, it had a small water cache tied to it. The trail always provides. 

We got into camp about 5:30. Wolf had a spot saved for us and Blue’s Clues had a fire going. There were already another 10 hikers set up with more trickling in. We are in a bubble of sorts. We are starting to get to know lots of hikers. 

For the first week, Bunny and I were pretty much by ourselves occasionally running into Bucky. Then after Julian, we met Wolf, Ivy, and Cheesy Turtle. When we made it to Warner Springs and took a double zero because of weather, we met maybe 10 other hikers. But once we jumped to Acton, it was just the 4 of us until Blue’s Clues caught up with us in Tehachapi. Once we went back to Paradise Cafe, we have had to share the trail. At first, it was a bit of a culture shock, but it’s starting to grow on me, seeing people over and over. It doesn’t seem as organic as the AT with its shelters, but we pick out larger campsites that will accommodate the 5 of us and others follow. Plus, Blue’s Clues builds fires. If you build it, they will come. 

EFG

Last night was very pleasant. BC built a fire which always livens up the night. There weren’t as many unexplained night sounds from the tents around us. No farts, no snoring, it was eerily quiet. Until some idiots alarm went off full blast at 6:15. Bunny needs to show me how to adjust the volume. 

As usual, Wolf was first out with Ivy about 10 minutes behind. Bunny and I left at 8:05 which is quickly becoming our standard departure time. Blue’s Clues was still in his tent. He was awake but knew that he had an easy day ahead of him since we are only planning on 10 miles. I knew he’d be in camp a couple hours before us, so I told him to have a fire going when we arrived. 

The trail started out just like it finished yesterday—washed out. Even though we were planning on a short mileage day, it was a tough hiking day with the first 4 miles of bushwhacking and a total elevation gain today of 4400’. It may not sound bad to young legs, but geriatric legs were quivering in anticipation of exhaustion. 

Before we had gone 2 miles, Blue’s Clues passed us. We were at a stream crossing where Bunny had just taken a hard fall. The night before last we had met Jigsaw who told us about his fractured knee cap. When he fractured it, the tendons pulled the pieces up and down in his leg because they are so tightly attached. Bunny had fallen hard on her knee and elbow and I was checking to see if her cap was where it should be or somewhere up in her mid-thigh. Fortunately, nothing was broken but it gave us both a scare. 

After another mile of scrambling, I was completely out of energy. We dropped our packs and I headed down to the creek to get some water when I fell. I thought I might have broken my little finger but I just tore our new CNOC bag. This day is taking a high toll: Bunny’s knee and elbow, my pinkie, and our water bag…and it’s not even 10, yet. 

We did finally make it to good trail running in the valley, but now it was hot. We’re climbing out of the desert into an alpine zone and we’re passing through a transition zone that has recently been burned. The only trees are dead and burnt but haven’t fallen yet. The cacti look like they are dying (I’m assuming from too much water). It was just not a pretty or pleasant walk.

Bunny doesn’t like to stop for lunch until we’ve hiked at least half of the miles we have planned for the day. We came to an unexpected stream about 6.5 miles in and I was ready for fuel. We ran into Wolf just finishing up his lunch break. He agreed with us that this was not turning into the easy day we had hoped for. He took off and we took a lunch break. When we were finishing, the lead hiker of a group of 9 weekend warriors we had leapfrogged with yesterday, caught up to us. We told them where we were headed for the night, but didn’t see any of them the rest of the day. 

The final 4.5 miles were just a steady grind uphill. I just had no energy and was barely shuffling along. We did run into a group of 4 middle aged men that were walking even slower than us. Our people are starting to show up on the trail. We chatted for a bit and then kept plodding on to our rendezvous. We even caught a glimpse of Wolf ahead of us so that tells us that either he might be hurting and tired, or, he has embraced the freedom of leisure. I can’t believe 28 years of military life followed by 9 years of DIA work can be turned around over night. It makes us feel a little better that he’s feeling today as well. 

We got to camp at 4. 8 hours to go less than 11 miles. BC did have a fire going as I had requested. We set up our tents and cooked supper. Wolf just went to his tent and didn’t come back out. While we were eating around the campfire, more thru-hikers started showing up and joining us. Bunny and I managed to stay up until almost 7 but we decided to leave all the youngins unsupervised and went to bed. Even though the sun is still up, the temperature is dropping. The smart, old folk can anticipate a cold night around 8000’ with patches of snow all around camp. 

EFG

Last night was the most pleasant night, temperature-wise, we have had on the entire trip so far. I slept without socks and a jacket and used my sleeping bag as a quilt. Bunny even shed some of her fur. We woke up with clothes strung everywhere. It looked like the remains of a very successful party. 

What woke us up was not the alarm I had set to start the coffee. It was Nirvana. At ten to six, we heard a large diesel pickup truck blaring Nirvana come at our camp. I tried to convince myself it was just a bad dream and I was still asleep, but my bladder was fully awake. There’s no turning back. I gave in to the little waterboy and started the coffee. I was almost back asleep when someone came out to the tents and said there was coffee inside and we could use the restroom. Ivy immediately popped up when she heard coffee. 

Bunny and I first ate the gourmet morning meal she has come to expect; oatmeal, granola, and chia pudding. I even had a special treat this morning—bacon. We packed up most of our stuff while we drank my special blend of coffee before we headed inside for the coffee and Snickers. The Mesa Wind Farm does really well for hikers. They provide free WiFi, breakfast sandwiches (for a nominal fee), free water, and use of restrooms. One of the techs came in and talked to us for a while. This was Roland. 

Roland has worked on the wind farm for 32 years. He was able to answer some specific questions I’ve had about wind energy. Our conversation did not excite Bunny in the same way it did me. This project (section of wind farm) has a little over 400 wind turbines ranging in size from 64 kilowatts to 1.2 megawatts. Because of California’s initiative to be 100% renewable by 2040, most of these older turbines will be upgraded in the next few years to a smaller number of larger turbines. He also confirmed that Tehachapi is the largest wind farm installation in the state. 

After a while, I excused myself to take advantage of trail porcelain. I’ve said this before, but being a living Playdo fun machine is not as much fun as it might sound. I haven’t given up on my die insert and food coloring addition to the hiker diet. Both of my nieces are creative and artistic. Perhaps this winter I’ll visit one of them and offer to watch the kids and maybe decorate a cake if the mood falls upon me. This way, I’ll find out where their cake decorating dies are so I can perform a feasibility study on my human die inserts. 

When I got back out to the tent, I told Bunny she needs to find out what brand of toilet paper they use because it was the softest, most absorbent I have ever used. Ivy and Blue’s Clues overheard me and agreed wholeheartedly. It feels good to get affirmation from my peers. 

With everything going on, it will be hard for people to believe this, but Bunny and I left camp at 8:05 with Ivy. Wolf, of course, had left a solid 20 minutes before us. The day started off with a solid 900’ climb through a barren valley, but when we crossed the ridge, we were rewarded with breathtaking views of mountains and a high plateau filled with a wide variety of blooming desert flowers. It was a perfect hiking day. 

Blue’s Clues quickly caught up with us and passed us, but he couldn’t resist the photo opportunities either. I asked him if his ideal job would be a National Geographic photographer? He carries over 10# of camera equipment with him. (Check him out on Instagram at MilesforMoments). He said his preferred career would be trophy husband. Speaking as one, I broke the bad news to him that it isn’t all glamour. I have to carry all the food, get up early to prepare her breakfast in bed, and stay up late to prep everything for her tomorrow. He might have better luck, though, since mine was only a “participation” trophy. 

We climbed again and descended into the Whitewater River Valley. This area was hit by terrible flash flooding back in February. It made national news by washing out the roads leading into Idyllwild. It also washed out the roads leading to the Whitewater Center which is usually pretty accommodating to PCT thru-hikers. Unfortunately for us, the trail to the center got wiped out and they are closed for the season. 

The trail follows the Whitewater River for a couple of miles before crossing it. It was along this stretch that a group of 9 guys passed us for the first time. We leapfrogged with this group for the rest of the day. They are all friends out for a short section hike of 50 miles into Big Bear. One of the guys had a hard time believing that we were actually thru-hiking the PCT. When we told him we hiked the AT last year, he asked how many miles of it. When we said all 2200 miles, he still refused to believe that a couple of old people could do that. To me, this is ageism. I’d just like to point out that we left this group of 30 somethings behind us by a couple of miles by the end of the day. 

Let’s talk about the end of the day. It pretty much sucked. The same flooding that isolated Idyllwild and hammered the Whitewater Center also did a number on Mission Creek. This was important to us because our final 3 miles of hiking today was up Mission Creek and we were without paddles. Mission Creek passes through several narrow stretches of canyon. With the flooding, it wiped out miles of banks and PCT that used to be on those banks. We had to keep crossing the creek (fast and deep) to try to make our way up canyon. It took us almost an hour and a half to go 1.2 miles. That’s slow even for us. 

We would find a section of trail and follow it for a little bit until it ended up missing at the bank of the creek. We’d then have to make our way up canyon, scrambling over rock slides, beating our way though undergrowth, and stumbling upon snakes (only one, but Bunny is not a fan). After the snake encounter, I was the designated leader even though up to that point I didn’t know what I was doing and was relegated to the back.

Eventually, we saw Blue’s Clues waiting on a bank in the distance and waving to us. He had been in camp for over 2 1/2 hours by the time we arrived. Keep in mind that he started almost 45 minutes after we did and then he toodled around with us for a couple of miles this morning taking pictures. I wish I could go faster, not that I want to, but it would be nice to get into camp early enough to take a nap before bed. I excel at sleeping. It’s my passion. 

We set up right next to everyone else. This is the closest our four tents have ever been.  We’ll be able to hear every snore, belch, fart, and pee in bottle that happens tonight and identify every culprit. No longer will Bunny be able to blame all her farts on me. I will indignantly say her name immediately after every fart that comes from our tent. That way, they’ll also know the snoring is not me, either. 

EFG